I AM ALIVE!

The Reality is that I AM!

Reality is that which exists; the unreal does not exist; the unreal is merely that negation of existence which is the content of a human consciousness when it attempts to abandon reason. Ann Rand

I AM!

What I have found lately is that I am already what I wanted to be and never been any other way. I have try for 7 years to become went I was already! It is hilarious! But I realize that I was always, I also realize that I was searching for "something" all those years and that "something" was to acknowledge just that, I AM! Went I read the book "Atlas Shrugged" from Ayn Rand, I found myself again. I have lost myself for a while cause I had some hard time and got cut thinking that he must be me. I must have done something wrong, and actually that specific thought that "I must I done something wrong" was the only thinking I did wrong. I was, just before I begin to think that though. I was, always and I am still and can never be otherwise. No one can be someone else. We can fake it for a while but our true self always come back to us. We may pretend for some time but at the end we still are, who we are. I wrote a song that was telling that the whole time "I Rather Be ME", now that's for sure!

So, for now on I AM, and always will BE.
And I LOVE IT!

Integrity?

Well, I guess integrity as several facet, some would believe that having integrity mean being what they want you to be so they could feel better about themselves, and then call you hypocrite went you do not comply to their views and doesn't do like they do or be like they are.

They ask you to tell them that they are good and capable went they're not. They want you to love them went they lie and pretend and have no respect toward themselves or others and prefer to be a whim and live in mediocrity and don't walk their own talk and they live in their dream as if it was real, but always fall short cause it is only wishes they are talking about and they have no aim or plan to actually living what they say they will.

They believe they have the right to all the excuses in the world and that they have the right to insult others who is doing it went they are just pretending to be someone who is doing it. Then, they talk about integrity! They scream out loud, I love integrity! But have no idea of the real definition of it: integrity as a concept has to do with perceived consistency of actions, values, methods, measures, principles, expectations and outcome. It means in a simple terms, walking your talks, not making invitations, promises, wishes or stories and not live up to it, that create disappointments, doubts, mediocre connections and all together misunderstandings.

The person without integrity will lie, make excuses, change plan without notice, tell all sorts of stories about being capable or will tell people that he or she is someone they're not and will take their wishes for the true and then wonder why people doesn't care or support or love them.

These people who claim that they are someone they're not, will tell everyone that the ex-wife, ex-friend, collaborate, bosses, the whole system, and the whole world is not fair. They want something for nothing. They want to be seen as they're not, they want people to believe their lies and complains that you are telling them went they are whim...they say why do you say think like that? Why are you telling me I am a whim went I am, can't you suck it up and accept that I will never be there for you and be the person I said I was. Get a life, get real, I was just pretending and now you should have seen it. Can't you see I only want to be love for nothing and be accept for my incompetence and my lack of integrity and my lack of pride in myself, my words and my actions.

Don't tell me what I am doing wrong, just tell me what I do right and I will stay the way I am and become a jerk more and more. Why don't you love me for being your personal jerk, why are you always so direct and intolerance of my incompetence? Why me? Why don't you believe my lies? Poor little me, I am a good person you know. Why don't you see that my intentions are real went I act totally against it? At less I am trying to be nice. It doesn't feel good to be lie to and to always be disappointed but what do you expect? You want me to be real? Or worst to see myself as I am? To actually looking to all my bad actions and my defaults as something I can change and become a better person? What do you want for me? Why are you so rude and tough on me? What do you really believe I can do it? Do you really believe I can really be a man of integrity? A man who can walks his talks? Do you want me to grow as a person? Do you believe I can? I have power? I am not in the mercy of anyone? I can't be that, I can't become better, can I?

You want me to become a better person...why? I am good enough, even if I lie to myself most of the time and I pretend to be someone else and I live on someone else power and I do not recognize my own power, and I chose mediocrity cause it is easier and I don't have to force myself to think to much and use my brain, by the way, I am doing just fine as it is you know, and I went through life just like everybody else.

You're such an hypocrite and a snob to act like you are. Hilarious!

Who to Thank?

I feel grateful today!

I want to thank my car makers for the great engineering, the nice designs and the all together beautiful product, made with so much perfection, attention and the great sound system too.

Thanks for all your efforts, and sweats and dedications to wanted to make a great product for me! I can see all the energy, the time, the imagination, the great minds working on my car concept. I see the reasoning, understanding and the struggles and challenges it must have take to make it right.

I am so grateful for those magnificent minds that wants to give this world great products and services for our convenience. I am grateful for those labors guys and gals who put them together with precise and definite touches.

You did a great job, Thank you!

What do Women Want?

This phrase give me chilled! What do women want? What a question! What do women suppose to want? Do we always have to ask? What does it mean? Man, are they wanting too? Is women wants really different then men? They do not want? I "AM" and that's all I need! I am stopping the "wanting" and act as a human been and a real person, cause I AM! If every women today stop asking what they want and realize that who they "Are" is a human been with top capacity and act as one, without asking for permission to be, act or exist and take the lead of their own life without complaining and ask stupid questions like that...maybe we women would see that we have it all and want nothing but live,love and enjoy! Same as men! Who to ask for permission? Who is my boss? Who is telling me I should ask? Who am I suppose to ask? For gods sake...stop asking and BE!

I know now and for all what I really want.
I want to BE and the good news is: I already AM!
Now, I go on with my magnificent self!

To BE or not To BE?

In the middle lays the point zero, where most of humanity is today. I was questioning my own place, and wondering if there is a reason to actually BEING, when zero is the stagnation of the whole. I wanted to enjoy and create and rise above mediocrity, but wasn't seeing a reason left to do so. I was in this wonder for over 7 years and looked for answers to the reason.

I have been accused of being myself! What's that? I was totally shocked that some people out there actually think that they have the right to dictate others rights to BE!
It took me a very long time to understand that it is real. That those people who are NOT looking for achievement, beauty, happiness or success, take the right to destroy your vision in the name of the whole that lays at point zero.

Reading "Atlas Shrugged" by Ayn Rand pointed out those "looters" (she calls them) for me, and I have finally seen the true essence of evil on earth. I never really believed that evil existed, I was too busy looking for enlightened beings and my own joy of creating, for my own sake. Then, Ayn Rand, with her heroic ideal that she proposes in Atlas Shrugged, values intelligence and talent…and Dagny, one of her main heroes, opened my heart again. It lead the road to myself, and made me see that I was doing just that...Being ME! Thank you, thank you, thank you! I am finally a free entity to BE and Do as I please...